Happy Sunday and happy autumn. It has been an absolutely crazy summer, and I am glad to be getting into a fresh season. I cannot even define the roller coaster that I have been on over the last couple of months, but it has been a shake-up. It’s like I haven’t even been living my own life anymore, but living some sort of Outer Limits episode. I wish I could explain it better than that. It’s all been really messy in my own head for a while, and I appreciate your patience as I sort all of it out. Hopefully, kicking off this Mise en Place after the new Equinox will be just the kick off I need to get things into gear. So, what’s going on?
What’s Going On-
The universe. Really, that is all that is and can be going on. And, listening to the universe is the key to a lot of life’s answers. Learning that lesson has been taking me on a whirlwind of insights and directions. There is a lot in all of our lives that we need to forgive ourselves for. By doing so, it helps to let go of all the fears and anxiety that can end up driving us. In all honesty, I have been living in that fear for a very long time. Longer than I have cared to accept. So, my life recently has been about moving forward past all of those preconceived fears and learning to trust in the universe’s path. It will be okay. And, sometimes it won’t feel okay. But, that’s okay too, I just cannot be afraid anymore.
This has been a tough journey, these last few months. I am sure my regular readers or anyone who cares to look back through the Mise en Place’s this summer can recognize how inconsistent and difficult this has been for me. I have gone through every stage of emotion from grief and anger, to optimism and joy. Most recently, over the last few weeks, I have been stumped, unsure of how to feel or what to do. I feel like my previous few blog entries have made zero to no sense, and it is a good representation of what has been going on in my head.
On that note, I do feel like things are clearing up. I had an absolute stupid evening last night, but I need to let that be what it is. Other than that my last few days have been all about getting back on track. I’m not in the clear, who knows if any of us ever are, but I can at least focus myself again. I have had all of these wonderful opportunities thrown at me from all directions of life, and I have been such a mess that I haven’t been enjoying them. My life may not be what I want it to be, but I need to be more grateful for what I do have.
And, there it is. My goal this whole month has been about putting away old baggage and making space for growth. The problem is, to put away old baggage, you need to find it, bring it to the surface, find all of its roots, face it directly, let all of those emotions come out, and be inside of it, before you can wrap it up in a nice little box and throw it in the incinerator. It’s hard, but it’s healthy. And, it might have caused a really messed up time for me, but it will make the future that much better. An interesting side-effect to that is not feeling like a victim anymore. All those things that hurt me cannot hold me back anymore. I need to own it all.
Last Week’s Posts-
- Check out this cross-blog event, as EricZor and I get into what is better: comic books or videa games.
- My first post went up for the new site Psillow. This is an interesting opportunity for me, writing about an ingredient that is unique to the culinary scene: psilocybin mushrooms.
Getting back to business.
Thank you for bearing with me this summer. I appreciate all of the support that many of my friends have shown me. You are all amazing people dealing with your own journeys so keep your head up and know that everything will be okay.